This Week’s Sign Of The Apocalypse: The Snowicane

snowicane

It’s clear sailing here in Boston, while the rest of the North East, including Rochester, NY is getting  hammered with snow, as my parents felt was news worthy enough for a 6am call.  But no, let’s take it a step further.  Let’s call it a “snowicane.”  What the hell is a Snowicane?  That word can’t be real.  The product of some overworked, underpaid hack from the Weather Channel.  Basically just scaring people into buying obscene amounts of canned goods.  Which I never understood, at all.  Mad run on the grocery store to survive the 12 inches of snow you get EVERY YEAR living in the North East. Cool it with the “I am Legend” stuff, alright?  Then of course there will be the obligatory interview with some resident of “small-town-hit-by-storm, USA”, and Susie Homemaker will be all surprised.  She literally “can’t believe” the weather.  Look, you live there, you moved or grew up there.  This has been happening every winter for the last 1,000 years.  How is it possible you’re suprised?  You can’t possibly be that dumb.  I bet you think strippers like you too.  Its 12+ inches. (that’s what she said).  You can start freaking out when we get 4+ feet and your stuck huddled around a fire eating cans of Cambells Chunky for 3 days.  Until then, chill with this SNOWICANE crap.

Readers Comments (2)

  1. Hey, Big Guy – Uncle Ed here again. You’ve got it so right…again. Your dad and I could tell you stories of our winter fun in Halifax (that’s Mass. for those who instantly think Nova Scotia). But it’s no different anywhere. A few drops of rain and we call it a flood. The leaves move and it’s a mammoth hurricane. You want extreme? Go to Haiti or Chile. Get a grip folks. Not to make light of those who are really suffering. Crack open the Cambells and light a fire. Love your work, Robster. Love you even more. Uncle Ed

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