Wake Up! ….With A Metaphor For How Your Sad Life Has Become


Introducing the "Girlfriend Pillow"

Sears has really taken the guess work out of what guys are looking for in a woman:  lumpy breasts and one arm.  They’ve boiled down the whole girlfriend-experience to this polyester and felt pillow: Two boobs, one arm, and no judgement .  Shit, I’ll take 10!Unfortunately the “Wife” model comes with crushing guilt and an in-law attachment.

Yes, this is very, very real….and from Sears.


Readers Comments (3)

  1. Optional See ‘n Say string that strokes your ego by repeatedly playing “I have felt tits!” (sold

    Look for the American Cancer Society to develop
    a ‘Post-Op Wife’ version for the Husband-of-a-Survivor demographic.

  2. this link is now being circulated around my office… great find, bro

  3. hmmmmmmm Where do I begin??
    I’ll take 20!


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