Some of my teammates, who will not remain nameless, have taken offense to the fact that I have not mentioned them in the category of “Overachieving Fat Linemen,” so I’d Like to make those corrections now:
Offensive Guard Zach Hurd: Girlfriend is former Ms. Teen Connecticut
(Zach was next to me as I published this post and made me include this picture)
Tight End (semi-fat-guy) Yianni Apostolakos: Girlfriend is from Upstate New York and looks like Marissa Tomei.
Defensive Tackle Brandon Dillon: Girlfriend looks like a combination between Jennifer Lopez and Jennifer Love Hewitt
Offensive Tackle (and sometime tight end) Dan Ryan: Girlfriend (well, significant other) is like a combination of every Jersey girl you’ve ever met and Martha Stewart (it’s a good thing)