New Years Day Bowl Run Down: Good Vs Evil Edition

I slept in today so we are joining this afternoon’s bowls already in progress…

Outback Bowl – Florida Vs Penn State

Good: Penn State. I love Jo Pa. Jo Pa loves coaching, and he loves football. He is 84 years old and has been at Penn State for 41 years. During that time we have had 11 different presidents. Jo Pa has never been involved in any sort of scandal, except for the forged BenGay coupon incident in 2008, and embodies all that is good about college sports. Jo Pa is old school cool. At this point his is just plain old, but I love him anyway. Even Penn State’s uniforms are cool.

Evil: Florida. Urban Meyer built a quality program at Utah. Then he bounced for greener pastures and led Florida to two national championships. Last year he claimed he was tired and Brett Favred (fake retiring, try and keep up people). Tired of figuring it out how he was going to win without Tim Tebow is my guess. Of course Meyer came back and led Florida to a 7-5 season. Now he is retiring again, making the Outback Bowl about him, and not about the living legend manning the opposing sideline. Shame on you Urban Meyer. I hope your chronic fatigue, or whatever you want to call it, enjoys the cold weather in Denver. Oh you don’t think he will be on the first plane out, with Tebow there to pick him up in a Jesus Wagon? Please.

Half Assed Prediction – PENN STATE 27 FLORIDA 13

Rose Bowl – Wisconsin Vs TCU

Good: TCU. The Horned Frogs, great name by the way, just completed their second undefeated season, and Coach Gary Patterson said “It’s awesome” that his team is in the Rose Bowl. I believe Patterson and I believe his team is genuinely excited to play in the Grand Daddy of them all. There quick, but undersized defense, which allowed just 11.4 points a game, will have a big test against the powerful Wisconsin ground attack. TCU got nudged out of the title game because Auburn and Oregon ran the table in power conferences. Getting screwed, and the fact that it would probably piss God, and Tim Tebow off, to put Texas Christian University in the bad column, land them here in the land of the good.

Evil: Wisconsin. I have worked at a Badger bar all season. Shaking off sleep to open up for the one o’clock games, and sometimes working doubles so that they young men and women from Madison could have a safe place to watch their team. They are evil. Why you ask? Because they are a bunch of ungrateful, cheap kids who think that a dollar is a sufficient tip for twelve shots of house tequila. They get sloppy drunk, leave their credit cards, and then dispute the charges. Even the attractive girls are obnoxious. There are a few exceptions, you know who you are and I apologize for lumping you in with the rest of the white devils. But I always get accused of only wanting sex just because I am a guy, so we all have our cross to bear don’t we?

Half Assed Prediction – In one of the best games of the year, the Horned Frogs will make me happy but cost me money…TCU 33 WISCONSIN 31

Tostitos Fiesta Bowl – Connecticut Vs Oklahoma

Good: Tostitos with salsa. Oh and UCONN. The Huskies moved up from I-AA 13 years ago and now find themselves as the Big East Champs facing an Oklahoma team that is used to the big bowl spotlight. Head Coach Randy Edsall says that it will be “fun” to compete against Oklahoma. I hope he is right. I also hope UCONN studies the Boise State tapes from their 2007 trip to the Fiesta Bowl against the Sooners, cause that game was lots of fun.

Evil: Oklahoma. Sorry Sooner fans, you’re evil by default. You are the Yankees tonight. You are supposed to be here. You are supposed to win. In other words, I hate you. But just for tonight. Tomorrow we are cool, ok?

Half Assed (Serious Wishful Thinking) Prediction – UCONN 24 OKLAHOMA23

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published.

*