Good News For The Bad News Cavs

020811_cavs

After their superstar quit on them in the playoffs last year, and then dumped them on national television, The Cavs deserved to fly under the radar this season. Truth is, we all felt for Cleveland and wished them the best of luck in what was sure to be a rough 82 games. But after all the turmoil of last year, the one thing that we wished most for this year’s Cavs was anonymity.

It’s hard to be anonymous when you are setting the all time record for futility. Cleveland has lost 25 games in a row. More than half of the league has not even lost that many games over the course of the entire season. Even the Buffalo Bills are starting to send out sympathy cards to Quicken Loans Arena.

Well long suffering people of Cleveland, Uncle Corey has your silver lining. Two little words that are going to turn around the decades of misfortune. Two words that will, if nothing else, help you finance a move to a better city.

Those two words…..MARTINGALE SYSTEM

For the uninitiated this is a pretty simple gambling system. It basically says that one outcome cannot come up over and over again in perpetuity. So you bet $20 on Red at the roulette table and it comes up Black. You then put $40 on Red, then $80, then $160. Eventually Red is going to come up. It just has to right?

Well Cleveland fans, your beloved Cavaliers have landed on Black a redonkulous 25 times in a row. That means that there is a Red right around the corner. It is time to benefit from your team’s historic losing streak. (Hint: You play the Pistons at home on Wednesday night. The Pistons are 19-32, with only 6 of those wins coming on the road.)

Put the house on Red tomorrow night good people of Cleveland. Then use the proceeds to get the HELL out of Cleveland. Do you really want to have to endure 25 more losses before an opportunity like this comes up again?

I didn’t think so. And send your Uncle Corey a check to thank him for changing your life.

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