As the he chart above sadly clearly illustrates, this “quarterback” from Monmouth is managing to beat UConn’s Johnny Mac. You FWG-lifers (otherwise known as the unemployed) are probably expecting me launch into some diatribe about how New Jersey is the armpit of America and how tattoo inspired T-shirts were born there. Well, I’m not. And not just because this in Monmouth College (of the Illinois persuasion)
Because I know, deep down that UConn, especially UConn football has the edge over Monmouth every day of the week, and twice on Saturdays. Not simply because UConn is real football, but because we got there first. We’re innovators. We act, you react.
Allow me to explain; You know how, say, you’d had a really successful career in business and as a family man. Pulling in 10 to 15 mil annually, married to the beautiful wife you’ve always dreamed of who is an excellent mother and an absolute panther in the sack? But, because mommy went slumming with a football player back in college, some bum making 30K a year now has the one thing you can’t buy: Got-there-first-bragging-right.
Well, the year was 2008—Spring Break to be exact–when UConn football players met a group of Monmouth (Jersey) students enjoying the Mexico sun pool side. Flexing our lineman bodies would surely do the trick (it didn’t) and we pursued with personality (it did). I’ll leave the details of this encounter to the imagination. I’m sure you’re saying, “a one time lapse in judgment by 5 or 6 coeds doesn’t condemn an entire learning institution…” And that’s where you’d be right, good reader. The sun was hot, the drinks were good, and the women were both. But, not an isolated incident as these Monmouth grads were spotted on UConn’s campus several times over the coming months exiting athletic housing in the wee morning hours.
So while I give Monmouth (Illinois) credit for trying to out do us, as with this video and any population of certified babes: Getting there first is everything.